Monday, October 14, 2013

His Excellency, Tryggvasson Ten Eyck

For those of you who've been wondering,

"What has Trygg been up to?" 

Here it is.

Trygg, traveled to Brussels to file Amicus Felidae Briefs with the World Court. 



This is what happened.


I wake up early to the smell of coffee.  This hasn't happened since Trygg left for Europe. 

I go out, and there his is, at the table. He made the coffee, he's reading the paper, he looks a bit tired.

"You could have told me you were coming home."

"I'm not smiling...."

"What happened?"

"Simple.  I decided that this whole EuroCrisis was having a bad effect on the feline population of Europe, so I go to Europe to the World Court to file Amicus Felidae briefs."

"Amicus Curiae?"

"That's friend of the court briefs.  I file friend of the cat briefs."

"I see.  And?"

"I spoke to the Judges in Chambers and the Judge told me I didn't have any standing to file Amicus Felidae briefs with the court.  And I said, as a cat, I have four legs, you only have two. Therefore, I have twice as much standing to file the papers as you do to dismiss them.  And he said, "On an individual basis you are correct. However, there are more of us than you, and collectively, we have more legs to stand on than you do."  And I said, so your going to throw my case out? And he said, "No. We're not throwing your case out, we're throwing you out."

"I see.  Now this begs the question, how did you get to Europe in the first place?"

"I travelled in the Diplomatic Couch."

"Couch?"

"I mean pouch.  I travelled in the Diplomatic Pouch."

"Uh....."

"All right. Look.  The Australian Ambassador to the UK wanted to bring a gift to the Brits on behalf of Australia. And, he decided to bring a pair of Kangaroos.  And--"

"And you travelled in the Diplomatic Pouch."

"Exactly."

"Which doesn't explain the long absence."

"Well, to increase my standing, I managed to become appointed Diplocat to the European Union."

"Diplocat?"

"Exactly."

"And?"

"And, I've been fanny-packing through Europe looking for support to bring a class action."

"Not backpacking?"

"Slim, I weight about 5 kilos."

"Kilograms."

"This is about the European Union, not Western Union.  Anyway, I sleep in backpacks.  I just poured some Kitten Kaboodle into a fanny pack and went on the road."

"I see.  How did it work out for you?"

"I'm back, n'est-ce pas?"

"Oui."

"Yes.  We indeed. it is nice to be back.  Enjoy your coffee.  I'm going to take a nap.  I'll fill you in on the details later."

Trygg went off to bed.

I poured my coffee.

Even the Cat Winks.

Warmest regards,

Slim

Copyright (c) 2013 Slim Fairview
All rights reserved.

slimfairview@yahoo.com

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